She Sang a Little While and Then Flew On
A bird flew into my front window this morning. I’ve been reflecting on it all day.
It appeared to be a juvenile mourning dove, though I am no expert. Frankly, this is Jeannessa’s territory and had she been here to take care of the little bird, it would not have been her first time. At just 12 years old, she rescued a bird that was stuck in a vineyard covered with netting. With no fucks to give about getting permission to go into the vineyard, and the confidence of an expert ornithologist, she went under the netting, gently scooped up the creature, and set it free. I, on the other hand, stood in my yard this morning just staring at the poor little bird on my front patio. Thank goodness for Google and a cohort of wise neighbors. While I am grateful for their sage advice, it should have been Jeannessa walking me through this task.
I put the cats inside, found a box and an old towel, and put on rubber gloves. I slowly approached the little guy or gal, and as soon as I did, it flew off. I felt it flap by me, but didn’t notice where it went. I think I was as startled as it was!
Throughout history and pretty much every culture, birds have carried all kinds of symbolism. They are often associated with a loved one who has passed or even being a manifestation of that person’s spirit, like the bird in The Astonishing Color of After by Emily X.R. Pan. Sitting down to work in my front room just minutes before the dove crashed into my window naturally feels like more than just a random act of nature.
The mourning dove is a symbol of peace, love, and devotion. They are associated with letting go of the past and embracing change. The last week has felt pretty heavy for me as I accompanied Maceo on his final college tours before he makes his decision. I’ve always been the kind of parent who encourages the birdies to fly the nest (no pun intended), but losing Jeannessa on the eve of Maceo graduating from high school and Arya getting her driver’s license feels like far too much change at once. Could this young dove be a message from Jeannessa encouraging me to let go? A reminder of the necessity to pause and get our bearings after a big crash, but then we must fly on?
It’s a lot to process between college trips, driving lessons, and of course, court this Friday, April 17 at 9:00am in Department 34 at the Hall of Justice Courthouse on West Hedding Street. If you are able to join us, we appreciate the support.
Online: Direct link to the MS Teams Hearing. If this link does not work, you can find the Remote Hearing page of the Superior Court of California of the County of Santa Clara here. Scroll down to Department 34, in the “morning session” column. Please be sure your camera and mic is off.
Should court details change, I will update here if possible- check back here Friday morning in case of updates.